Let’s talk Cher. She’s badass, she doesn’t give a damn what people think of her, and she’s remained consistently hot for the past 40 years. The woman’s a goddess. “If I Could Turn Back Time” is one of my favorite songs. And the video is just so damn campy! Within 15 seconds, Cher’s on a battleship, coming out of a wall of 19-year-old sailors dressed in nothing but a mesh leotard, a leather jacket and big hair. What else could you possibly want from a pop star?
And to counter, a total downer (because that’s just how I roll). I think this song is fucking beautiful.
I’m pretty sure these are my favorite posts to make.
My very first CD was the soundtrack to The Lion King, and because at that time CDs were way too expensive, it was a while before my mom got me any other ones. I spend a solid two years jamming to the cheesy classic “Hakuna Matata”. And I very much still wake up singing Pumbaa’s part.
And to counter, the best White Stripes song to date:
I am in need of a cheesy song pick-me-up. Why, you ask? Because I got run over by two boisterous dogs yesterday.
They were tumbling around, playing and I got up to switch seats (ew, sunshine!) and they were coming towards me. I stopped because I thought there was NO way they would just run into me. Oh, but they did! It felt like a rolling cannonball took my legs from under me, propelling my body into the atmosphere. I was in mid-air, parallel to the ground, which I bet looked quite gracious. Any grace was lost the second I belly-flopped on the ground.
So to soothe the aching bruise on my hip, I present myself (and you) the best worst song that is as equally dramatic as my fall:
Now for the counter:
Hot DAMN, that song is amazing.
We are all thoroughly guilty of enjoying songs that are objectively terrible. The lyrics tend to be basic (as in “We got food everywhere as if the party was catered”) and the subject matter objectionable, but it just has that hook that speaks to your primordial affinity for rhythm.
I like to call them “best worst songs” because, regardless of what you want your friends to think, you know you bounce around to them in your PJs. So I’m dedicating a day especially to these awfully awesome examples of music, beginning with the best worst song that started it all for me: R Kelly’s “Ignition (Remix)”.
And to counteract (you know, because the universe dictates a balance must exist), here is an indubitably amazing song: